Buying a home is one of the biggest financial decisions most people will ever make. It can be an emotional process, filled with excitement, anxiety, and sometimes hesitation. In a recent online discussion, a buyer raised an honest question many people wonder about but rarely ask: “If I have been working with a real estate agent and decide to pause my home search, should I compensate them in some way?”
This person had been looking at homes for several months, appreciated the agent’s responsiveness and professionalism, but felt uneasy about walking away without making a purchase. With interest rates high and uncertainty in the housing market, they decided to wait. Their concern was whether it would be disrespectful or inconsiderate to leave their agent empty-handed after months of work.
What Real Estate Professionals Say: The Industry Standard
The overwhelming response from experienced real estate agents and brokers was clear. No, you are not expected to compensate an agent unless you close on a home. That is how the industry works. Agents know that not every client will make a purchase right away. They take that risk willingly, investing their time and energy in the hope that you will eventually become a happy homeowner and that you will work with them.
However, there was an important caveat repeated by many: loyalty matters. If you decide to pause your search, do it respectfully. Let your agent know your reasons and reassure them that when the time is right, they will be the first person you call. Do not ghost them. Do not switch agents without explanation. Do not use their time, then jump ship to a new agent or go straight to a builder when you resume your search. That is what leaves agents feeling used.
Simple Gestures That Go a Long Way: Showing Appreciation
While you are not obligated to pay your real estate agent for their time, many people shared thoughtful ways to show appreciation. A kind thank-you card, a gift card to their favorite coffee shop, or even a bottle of wine are simple but meaningful. If the agent has gone above and beyond, offering a lunch or writing a heartfelt online review can be a great way to show that their time was valued.
Even better than a gift? Referrals. If you liked working with your agent, tell your friends. Mention them on social media. Recommend them to coworkers who are thinking of buying or selling. Most agents rely heavily on word of mouth to grow their business. A personal endorsement from you can mean more than a few hundred dollars ever could.
The Importance of Communication: Keeping the Relationship Strong
One of the best takeaways from this conversation is the importance of being open. Most agents are reasonable, understanding people. They know that the market changes. Rates rise and fall. Life happens. If your search is on hold, just say so. Let your agent know that you appreciate them, and explain what you are thinking. That simple act of communication preserves the relationship and sets you up to work together again in the future.
Many agents even admitted they have encouraged their clients to take a break when the timing was not right. A good agent wants you to make the right decision, not just a fast one.
Final Thoughts: Honesty and Respect Go a Long Way
If you find yourself in this situation, take a deep breath. You do not owe your agent money if you hit pause on your home search. What you do owe them is honesty, respect, and when the time is right your business. If they treated you well, treat them the same. In a world where loyalty can feel rare, your integrity will stand out.
Ask a Real Estate Expert: Get Honest Guidance
Have more questions about working with a real estate agent or navigating a changing housing market? Ask below or send a message. With over 25 years in the industry, I am here to offer honest, unbiased guidance every step of the way — no pressure, no sales pitch, just real advice for real people.
